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Goodbye, Forever

by Cooper!

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  • T-Shirt/Apparel + Digital Album

    MIGHT JUST FUCK AROUND AND BUY A BAD ASS T-SHIRT

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    ships out within 14 days
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  • Poster/Print + Digital Album

    a zine about being mentally present. shit i find useful, things I think about, mindful experiences that I've had. all hand-collaged <3

    Includes unlimited streaming of Goodbye, Forever via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 14 days
    Purchasable with gift card

      $3 USD or more 

     

1.
Teeth 02:36
my mouth's been full of blood for three days straight now it's hard to feel great when your teeth are falling out and my brain's been a mess since I don't know when and this aching in my upper lip is not helping with it OooOOOOOOooooOOOooOoOoooOOOoo sometimes I get so in my head it's hard not to feel isolated sometimes I get lost in my thoughts I'm stranded try to go outside ride my bike hang out with my friends in the broad daylight sometimes doin good stuff don't feel right OOOOooOooooOOOOOOOooooOoOoOOoOo my car's been at the bar for three days straight now I would go get it but I've been too drunk to drive now I'm three shots in and I'm bleeding from my shin and this lack of coherency is not helping with it OOOOoOOooOOOOOOOOooo yada yada I'm sad OOOoOOOoooooOOOoooooooOOooooOO I'm gonna get shit done today I'm gonna go out of my way to take care of myself even if it kills me I'm gonna help myself today patch up my knees and wash my face cuz I deserve love no matter what my brain says 1...2....1 2 3 4 OOoOoooooOOOoOOooooooOOoOoOooOo KEY CHANGE OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
2.
Headbanger 01:52
I BANGED MY head against the wall I slammed it against the bathroom stall I wanted so badly to break my skull but my head's too thicc for a pessimist so I walked around with bruises on my face a burning purple shame displayed for days I guess it's fucking time for a change This (2, 3) isn't fun anymore and it hasn't been for months now maybe it never was at all now sedating and numbing can only go so far I guess I should start giving a fuck now
3.
Gainesville 03:42
I drank so much coffee I'm feelin out of my body screamin along to country songs on the back roads to Gainesville the further I get from the place I call home the less and less I start feelin alone oh no it's happening again I get used to a place and then leave all my friends SO HERES ANOTHER SONG ABOUT LEAVING I KNOW YOU DONT WANT ME TO BE SAD BUT I ALSO KNOW THAT ME MOVIN AWAY SCARES YOU MORE THAN YOULL ADMIT TO YOURSELF SO HERES ANOTHER SONG ABOUT LEAVING THIS PLACE MAKES ME BOTH HAPPY AND SAD AND I ALSO KNOW THAT ME MOVING AWAY IS THE BEST THING I CAN DO FOR MYSELF ITS THE BEST THING I CAN DO FOR MYSELF this place is evil and I've got to get away it brings out your weaknesses, your flaws it makes excuses for them all and THIS PLACE is a trap it pins you down and fills your throat your heart your stomach and your lungs with alcohol until you choke and i'll miss things like lying in your bed waking up to pancakes, coffee, and kisses on the forehead SOOOOO.....^^^^ and I'll miss things like lying in your bed waking up to pancakes, coffee, and existential dread drown the anxiety with cheap champagne escape the party go out and cry in the gahdam bushes again...
4.
Cowboy Blues 02:04
I got the CoWbOy bLuEs the kind that makes ya tremble in yer boots what's a good ol' country boi like me to do? I'll grab my truck pack my shit and test my luck I might just fuck around and drive my ass to Georgia I got them CoWbYo bLuESs the kind that gets yer banjo outta tune can't eat can't sleep stuck in all this dang ol' gloom I'll grab my truck country roads gon' lift me up I might just fuck around and drive my ass to Georgia drive my ass to GeorgiAAAAooOOOOOGEORGIAAAHHHHH drive my ASS TO GEORGIAAAAAA
5.
Ghost 03:07
I'm just an idea I'm whatever you want me to be but as soon as I'm out of your head I cease to exist not something ya miss and I don't know where to go when I'm unoccupied like a ghost without a body or a thought without a mind I'm having trouble pretending to be myself every time you're not around I turn into someone else my identity's formed by hastily glued insults and compliments others have used to describe the awkward shots I take just trying to participate
6.
Never Learn 02:42
I wonder if you'll ever learn... you keep making the same mistakes and I keep giving you all these breaks just hoping that you'll show your better side you won't listen to anyone's advice fucked up again and then act surprised I've given you all I have tried but you say you're just here to get what you want... I've tried, I've cried, I've cared for you but you crossed my boundaries like you do I finally cut you off and are you said that you were wrong or because your self-image was burned? I wonder if you'll ever learn... oh no, you hurt someone again apologize cuz they're your friend but sorry is empty without a change you fall into familiar patterns act like my feelings don't matter but I know you feel something besides shame... and you say you're just here to get what you want... empathize cuz yeah, I've been there too trying hard to just feel something new blind to my path of destruction a hurricane hit land from the ocean but that is no excuse you're still responsible for you no one gets better wallowing in their self-pity we are always working on ourselves don't push away the ones who try to help
7.
Here 02:26
I think I'm finally here no, like really here you can see it in my eyes I used to nod and smile then zone out for a while with guilt trips screaming in my mind is this what it's like living life like you're alive? i finally feel in control three long months alone with my thoughts who knew I'd be ok on my own? silence was my greatest fear until I practice being here (which ain't as easy as it seems) sometimes silence turns to inner violence and the world outside just feels like a dream sometimes silence turns to inner violence and we let that violence TAKE CONTROL sometimes silence turns to inner violence and then that violence TAKES ITS TOLL sometimes silence turns to inner violence but WE ARE NOT OUR THOUGHTS AT ALL

about

Goodbye, Forever... to unhealthy coping mechanisms... to self-destructive guilt... to cities stained by painful memories... to buildings no longer standing that I used to call home...

credits

released October 23, 2020

Bri: guitar & vox & keys
Ry Ry: bass & lead guitar
Nathan: drumz & lead guitar
recorded by Nathan (listen to GRUPH & Lesser Nephew!)
mixed & mastered by Thomas (listen to Melt Channel and Magic Circuit!)

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about

Cooper! Gainesville, Florida

the Shania Twain of DIY

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